Getting Into The Flow
I’ve had the good fortune lately to feel like things are going along smoothly, that I’m in the flow and serendipity is my friend again.
I seem to go through times when the universe is smiling on me and other times when I’m crashing into obstinate boulders that try to do more than just bruise me.
Another business owner friend of mine and I were talking about this phenomenon and why it happens. We came to the conclusion that it had a whole heap to do with our own attitudes and how powerful thoughts are.
When I’m frazzled I’m off-kilter and crash into those nasty boulders. When I’m feeling good within myself I have much better thoughts – more positive and calm – and life flows along much more easily.
So I’m trying to refocus on constructive, healthy and happier behaviours, thoughts. I’m listening to what I’m saying in my head, to the patterns and taking a step back to reflect and change when they’re getting negative.
Initially this is a strange thing to do. Being so self aware without being self-obsessed can be a balance. But as with all new things – habits, skills, activities – it takes a few goes to figure it out and trust yourself.
One of the interesting things I stumbled into with this learning curve was realising I needed to have a positive to counteract the negative. So when I was getting frustrated with a dear friend and getting grumpy (heading towards snappy) with her I heard my thoughts and stopped for a moment. She was just being herself.
We are two different women and come at things differently, and then I remembered that’s one of the things that I treasure about her, she’s different to me and we have a great friendship. Yes, there are times when that causes clashes but I can turn that around to appreciating her for being herself with me. And I with her.
Answering the thought “do I really need to hang onto that?” can be really useful. If you do need to hang onto whatever is causing the upset then deal with the issue either immediately or later – whichever time frame and method of approach will get the best results – the most constructive results.
Once I stopped the negative thought cycle and had a chance to take a mental breath I could see what was happening and could choose a positive response that was far more enjoyable than staying on a negative path.
After that we had a lovely afternoon together and I enjoyed my day – much easier than being grumpy and having an upset that ruined the afternoon.
Like all of us I have my own set of triggers that get me going – either happy or grumpy. Being aware of what they are and how you’re reacting to a situation makes a big difference to how your day goes.
When you’re feeling bad, negative, grumpy your day follows your mood; you miss the train and the next one is packed, you send off an email half baked, you click delete rather than save, you snap so quickly and get bitten back, you have a bingle in the car and the insurance lapsed last week – you know what happens.
But when you’re feeling good about the world and yourself the universe works in your favour; your favourite seat on the train is there waiting for you, there’s no lines at the supermarket, you get a surprise boost at work for a project that’s important, the kids don’t seem to be carrying on so much – life is just easier, you’re in the flow.
So take a step back and have a think, what’s happening with you at the moment, what do you want to be happening? Have a listen to your thoughts in your head to see if they need some fine tuning (or overhauling) to being more constructive, happier and positive.
It takes some practice and there are just some days that are just best left alone but they can be in the minority and be further and further apart.
Being in the flow of life is one of the best experiences of our existence. Given it’s a human existence there will be times when you slip out of the flow but developing skills that you have power over to help you get back into the flow makes life that much richer and better. Let those stubborn boulders move to the side of your path and enjoy the journey!
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